Speaking of Kissing – Bruce Monson
New Era
June 2001
Click above for full article.
Here’s an excerpt:
““How Much Kissing is Too Much?”
This question is catchy and interesting—but the “how much” approach is the wrong way to look at this issue. The first kiss given by a girl I know to a certain fellow [was one too many], because it led to many more and to a miserable marriage.
The important questions are these: Whom should I kiss? Why? Under what circumstances?
Many things around you encourage you to give affection, such as your physical maturity, movies, advertising, music, stories, articles, and conversation. Granted this is the trend of the day. But there are good reasons why you should be discriminating and self-controlled in your giving of affection. As you are aware, kissing is more stimulating than satisfying; consequently, it invites more and more. Once a couple begins to share affection in a physical way, this activity tends to become the focus of interest. Often such a couple ceases to explore the other significant dimensions of personality: mind, character, maturity, religious faith, moral values, and goals.
Affection should grow out of genuine friendship and brotherly love, not precede them, if one wishes to be sure of having real and lasting love in marriage. Kissing for the sake of kissing invites more affection, and many fine young people become more deeply involved than they actually wish to be.
Affection should never be sought after as an end in itself, because this does violence to a person.
Excerpted from Lowell Bennion, Q&A, New Era, Feb. 1971, 5–6.
Counsel from the Prophet
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“The Lord has made us attractive one to another for a great purpose. But this very attraction becomes as a powder keg unless it is kept under control. It is beautiful when handled in the right way. It is deadly if it gets out of hand.
“It is for this reason that the Church counsels against early dating. This rule is not designed to hurt you in any way. It is designed to help you, and it will do so if you will observe it.
“Steady dating at an early age leads so often to tragedy. Studies have shown that the longer a boy and girl date one another, the more likely they are to get into trouble.
“It is better, my friends, to date a variety of companions until you are ready to marry. Have a wonderful time, but stay away from familiarity. Keep your hands to yourself. It may not be easy, but it is possible” (New Era, Jan. 2001, 13).
—President Gordon B. Hinckley”
